Dating a child of alcoholics
My mother is the one having long talks with my husband at night, or going to a nice restaurant with him or the theatre and I am at a grubby pub every night with my alcoholic lover.
I have started stalking them, sitting in the car down the street from our house, drinking vodka from the bottle, and watching them come out hand in hand to play tennis in the courts down the street or go out to dinner.
I am drawn to men who are starkly different than my husband, who is an intellectual, moderate in terms of his vices and has a disdain for the type of men who spend every evening in a pub.
I have a drinking problem but it is not a problem I feel any need to resolve and I am drawn to men who are also drinkers like me.
It sounds to me like you left him, slowly, on the installment plan, and then he decided to hasten the end by setting everything on fire, including the bridges. When you agreed to an open marriage, did you both envision a situation where either or both of you would move out for long periods of time?
And, maybe there’s a reason you never want to be at home where he is lately? ) I have so many questions, like, do you hang out, ever? What does “normal” or “the desired outcome” for your marriage look like to y’all? Is there a compelling reason to stay married to him, beyond say, the legalities or force of habit?
And your mother chooses the one man in the universe who is married to her daughter?
That is some unfathomable shitheadery right there, from both of them. I don’t believe that there is romantic love that is somehow divorced from the choices you make about what to do about your feelings.
It was my mother and, from the way they looked at each other and were touching, I could tell instantly that it was more than a friendly lunch; they were quite obviously in love with each other.
My mother is 54 years old and is breathtakingly beautiful and, unlike me, hasn’t let her body go.